tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8453283760103801471.post1219170689115855594..comments2023-04-27T09:44:47.755-04:00Comments on make.share.give: write, sharemake.share.givehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01576370591210075243noreply@blogger.comBlogger2125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8453283760103801471.post-74668304978960369682014-07-09T09:19:43.173-04:002014-07-09T09:19:43.173-04:00Responding for Teacher's Write:
1. What works ...Responding for Teacher's Write:<br />1. What works and why? love, love, love "you come too". Best invitation ever...universal and appeals to all ages. I love the photo of your Dad and the "old fella". Such a sunny piece as I sit inside the grey-green gloom of a rainy morning in No. VA. Great setting for a story....and, wonderful characters: Granny, Dad, both as teens and the turtle, kids checking the bathroom. Narrator. All are related and connected to the beach.<br />2. What doesn't work and why? I'm so uncomfortable with "doesn't work". I think if it's your writing....quick write, draft, scribbled thoughts...it's working. I do have some questions. What was the temperature? I assume hot? but, is it hot-hot like I imagine Florida? Or, is it mild hot because it's morning...is it morning? is that why the beach is deserted? If you were sketching this scene in colored pencils would you start with cool tones? warm tones? why? Does the beach have that fresh salty fragrance? Or, does it smell of washed up seaweed....tangy and decomposing?<br />3. If this is a beginning does it hook? compel to keep reading? I'd love to know why Granny and Dad as teens tie into this specific trip to the beach.....I'm smelling a circle-of-life type story here with the narrator and her kids. yes? Let me know!<br />Linda Mitchellhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00833034575304594924noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8453283760103801471.post-35844828432894461592014-07-08T17:18:36.301-04:002014-07-08T17:18:36.301-04:00Enjoy your vacation! Enjoy your vacation! Katehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02876375845688651131noreply@blogger.com